i loves me some nuggets

that is k.c. she loved nuggets, so much so she would climb into then mcdonald's bag and try to get them. her whole body was inside the bag before i took this picture, then she backed out, but i enticed her and she stuck her head back in.

she died on saturday.
it has been miserable and yet, somehow, a relief.
you see, she has been sick.. and it came on rather quickly. liver and kidney issues. about a month ago she became really sick and i had her at the vet for about a week. she wouldn't eat or drink.. but then she started getting better.
i took her home with her prescription meds, her prescription food, and a subdermal fluid pack (it looks like an iv, but instead of giving her fluids through her viens, you give her fluids under her skin).
she started drinking almost immediately (which is better than when she was at the vets), and she began to eat.
then all of a sudden, she stopped.
and she got skinny. and i could tell her days were numbered.
then on saturday, i picked her up and she went into cardiac arrest, so i laid her on the bathroom floor and watched her little body go limp.
she was still breathing when i got her in her cat carrier, but she died before i got to the vet (where i would have had her put down).
her collar is still in my car, and the little bell was jingling all the way home from the vet.
needless to say, i was destroyed.
so i laid down in bed to take a nap, and the other cat (gemini) came up to me and laid down right beside me.. and her eyes were bright yellow, and i swear it was k.c. taking one last nap.
**
and now i must move on. i mean, i know she was just a cat. to many it makes no sense to be distraught over an animal.
but she was more than that to me.
and i don't think i can ever explain it.
and i don't think i have to.